Going back

I'm going back to 505. I wish I could have said a proper goodbye. I would have waited for you even if its a seven hour flight or a forty five minute drive. I would have waited for eternity, just to have seen you. In my imagination your waiting, lyin' on your side. With your hand between your thighs...

I miss you and all the things about you. I am in a dark room again, slightly going back to who I was. I can't let myself believe it was all just a dream. Stop and wait a sec. Was it all a lie in my mind? Why were you repeating you were not good enough for me even though I never said so? But When you look at like that my darlin' what did you expect? You only followed what you believed was true. I was so paralyzed I couldn't even say no. I could not say that I was never enough for all you did for me. That you were crazy, blind by the time we spent apart, and terrorized by the idea of not seeing me again. I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck. If I could ever feel them, as the first, even the last time I would ever. I would've felt in the sky. Or I did last time I checked.

When we started talking, you were never too shy. Not shy of a spark, but when I got to know you I've seen many barriers you put up to protect yourself. I hope by breaking those, I haven't made you suffer, as the knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark. When I met you, I was scared to repeat my mistakes again and get hurt again. I went cautiously, stepping very carefully, Frightened by the bite, though it's no harsher than the bark. And I started loving you more everyday, by the middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start. I thought to myself that I was not going to allow to get hurt again. I would be strong. I thought to myself I have found someone which was the one. Which was gonna heal my heart from all the unsensitive people I have encountered, wishing me to perish after all the toxic gas I was inhaling.

I am going back to 505. If I were you I would go back to the beginning, I would imagine us alone, wanting to meet each other from away, even if it was a seven hour flight or a forty five minute drive. Imagining you, I have a clear image, waiting for the day it will come true. In my imagination your waitin', lyin' on your side. With your hand between your thighs...

BUT I CRUMBLE COMPLETLY WHEN YOU CRY. IT SEEMS LIKE ONCE AGAIN YOU HAVE TO GREET ME WITH GOODBYE

Did you cry that afternoon? Before you told me what you were about to say? When I thought it was not easy, trying to see and type between tears, wishing it wasn't true. My hands shaking for the thought, going back to the dark room, weak enough to not have flighted. For being coward, now I write my pain hoping you see it. I'm always just about to go and spoil a surprise. I thought since the year was starting, the future had bigger plans for us. I had hope just like everybody else does. I was waiting on an opportunity. I though my birthday would've have mean anything for you. Take my hands off of your eyes too soon.

I am going back to 505. Still in the dark room, looking at the light with despair in my eyes. I have no idea where to go, and I have no one to accompany me. Seems like a stopping point. I prefer to picture you. In my imagination, you're waitin' lyin' on your side, with your hands between your thighs and a smile. I would have gone there to see that smile, even if it's a seven hour flight or a forty-five minute drive.

Seems like once again you had to greet me with goodbye....

CREDITS

505- Artic Monkeys Composer: Alex Turner

Lyrics of 505 © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC